{"id":5832,"date":"2017-06-15T10:08:47","date_gmt":"2017-06-15T08:08:47","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/sydologie.com\/?p=5832"},"modified":"2024-11-22T17:27:29","modified_gmt":"2024-11-22T16:27:29","slug":"jdf-episode-1-imaginez-pire-meme-sil-nest-jamais","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/06\/jdf-episode-1-imaginez-pire-meme-sil-nest-jamais\/","title":{"rendered":"#JDF Episode 1\u00a0: imaginez le pire, m\u00eame s\u2019il n\u2019est jamais s\u00fbr"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><em>Nous lan\u00e7ons une nouvelle s\u00e9rie d&rsquo;articles : \u00ab\u00a0Le journal du formateur\u00a0\u00bb. Ces articles seront l&rsquo;occasion de faire le tour des gal\u00e8res que connaissent tous les formateurs, mais aussi de mettre en avant les meilleurs moments de ce chouette m\u00e9tier. Vous souhaitez vous aussi t\u00e9moigner ? Ecrivez-nous : contact@sydologie.com<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>La directrice de la formation avait r\u00e9serv\u00e9 une nouvelle salle pour la journ\u00e9e que j\u2019animais. J\u2019aimais bien les nouvelles salles moi, \u00e7a me donnait l\u2019impression d\u2019avoir un chouette bureau pour y recevoir mes form\u00e9s. Sur le site internet, elle avait l\u2019air carr\u00e9ment canon en plus. Alors forc\u00e9ment, je r\u00eavassais dans le RER, d\u2019autant que j\u2019\u00e9tais large niveau horaire\u00a0: il \u00e9tait 8h12, il me restait 2 stations, et la formation commen\u00e7ait \u00e0 9. Je me voyais d\u00e9j\u00e0 arpentant ma salle immense, dispensant mon savoir de loin \u00e0 mes ouailles m\u00e9dus\u00e9es en redemandant des viennoiseries.<\/p>\n<h2>Retour vers le futur<\/h2>\n<p>A 8h16, alors qu\u2019une form\u00e9e fascin\u00e9e me posait imaginairement une question \u00e0 laquelle je m\u2019appr\u00eatais \u00e0 r\u00e9pondre avec un sch\u00e9ma et brio, le RER s\u2019est arr\u00eat\u00e9 entre deux stations et la lumi\u00e8re s\u2019est \u00e9teinte. Je ne raconterai pas comment j\u2019ai v\u00e9cu les minutes qui ont pr\u00e9c\u00e9d\u00e9 le retour de la lumi\u00e8re dans la rame, n\u2019insistez pas. Toujours est-il que quand on est repartis, j\u2019avais enlev\u00e9 ma veste, j\u2019\u00e9tais assis par terre dans le fond de la rame et je pleurais un peu. J\u2019ai regard\u00e9 l\u2019heure, il \u00e9tait 8h46 et je devais\u00a0:<\/p>\n<p><em>(obligatoirement)<\/em><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Trouver le complexe o\u00f9 \u00e9tait la salle (13 mn)<\/li>\n<li>Trouver la salle dans le complexe o\u00f9 \u00e9tait la salle (8 mn)<\/li>\n<li>Allumer mon ordi (12 mn, je n\u2019ai pas l\u2019heur de faire partie des collaborateurs \u00e0 qui on en a achet\u00e9 un nouveau)<\/li>\n<li>Ouvrir tous les docs n\u00e9cessaires (entre 1 et 14 mn pour la m\u00eame raison)<\/li>\n<li>Connecter mon ordi au vid\u00e9oprojecteur fourni (entre 0,5 et 20 mn)<\/li>\n<li>Passer aux toilettes pour commencer dans de bonnes conditions (3 mn)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><em>(facultativement)<\/em><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Manger au moins un mini-pain au chocolat parce que j\u2019avais rien dans le ventre \u00e0 part un bol de th\u00e9 glougloutant<\/li>\n<li>Bouger les tables et chaises afin d\u2019adapter la configuration de la salle \u00e0 mes exigences p\u00e9dagogiques<\/li>\n<li>Trouver des feuilles A4 et A3 puisque j\u2019en aurais certainement pas assez<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Il fallait donc tout simplement que je remontasse le temps. Quand j\u2019ai r\u00e9alis\u00e9 que je perdais des minutes suppl\u00e9mentaires \u00e0 faire le total des minutes que j\u2019avais perdues, j\u2019ai sprint\u00e9 dans les couloirs du m\u00e9tro, perdant au passage le ticket qui me permettrait d\u2019en sortir et l\u2019\u00e9charpe bleu et jaune en alpaga que j\u2019aimais tant.<\/p>\n<p>Bien entendu, je n\u2019ai pas eu le temps de faire le quart des t\u00e2ches obligatoires sus-list\u00e9es.<br \/>\n<img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"900\" height=\"598\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-5840\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/sydologie.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/exportgif.gif?resize=900%2C598\" alt=\"\" \/><\/p>\n<h2>Pr\u00e9voyance est m\u00e8re de\u2026 prudence est la cousine de\u2026 enfin vous voyez, quoi<\/h2>\n<p>Si vous tenez vous aussi \u00e0 commencer \u00e0 l\u2019heure et \u00e0 votre \u00e9charpe en alpaga, voici donc quelques conseils\u00a0:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Votre formation commence \u00e0 9h et vous avez 1h de trajet\u00a0? partez \u00e0 5h30 pour \u00eatre peinard\u00a0;<\/li>\n<li>Si vous ne connaissez pas la salle de formation, prenez le temps d\u2019aller lui faire un coucou quelques jours avant la formation\u00a0pour savoir o\u00f9 elle est situ\u00e9e et ne pas perdre de temps le jour J\u00a0;<\/li>\n<li>J\u2019insiste\u00a0: prenez le temps d\u2019aller jusqu\u2019\u00e0 la salle elle-m\u00eame, et avec votre mat\u00e9riel, pour v\u00e9rifier que tout est compatible, que vous avez le bon adaptateur, les bons codes wifi, etc.\u00a0;<\/li>\n<li>Empruntez un ordi qui avance si le v\u00f4tre est comme celui de tout le monde\u00a0;<\/li>\n<li>Si vos coll\u00e8gues mieux lotis ne sont pas pr\u00eateurs (ils le sont rarement), d\u00e9marrez votre ordinateur avant de partir\u00a0;<\/li>\n<li>Copiez tous les docs dont vous avez besoin sur une cl\u00e9 et attachez-la autour de votre cou\u00a0: en cas de p\u00e9pin technique, vous serez un poil moins emb\u00eat\u00e9\u00a0;<\/li>\n<li>Et ne buvez pas 3 litres de th\u00e9 avant de partir, m\u00eame si votre nouveau \u00ab\u00a0saveurs \u00e9pic\u00e9es\u00a0\u00bb est divin.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>&nbsp;<br \/>\n&nbsp;<br \/>\n&nbsp;<br \/>\n<strong>Retrouvez tous les articles du journal du formateur ci-dessous : <\/strong><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/06\/jdf-episode-1-imaginez-pire-meme-sil-nest-jamais\/\">#JDF Episode 1 : imaginez le pire, m\u00eame s\u2019il n\u2019est jamais s\u00fbr<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/07\/jdf-episode-2-mutinerie\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 2 : La mutinerie<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/09\/jdf-episode-3-encephalogramme-plat\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF \u00e9pisode 3 : Enc\u00e9phalogramme plat<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/10\/jdf-episode-4-acoustic-learning\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF \u00e9pisode 4 : Acoustic Learning<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/11\/jdf-episode-5-test\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF \u00e9pisode 5 : Le test<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/12\/jdf-episode-6-massive-open-offline-crash\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF \u00c9pisode 6 : Massive Open Offline Crash<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2018\/02\/jdf-episode-7-non-enfants-numerique\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 7 : Les non-enfants du num\u00e9rique<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2018\/02\/jdf-episode-8-naufrages-clic\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 8 : Les naufrag\u00e9s du clic<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2018\/04\/jdf-episode-9-attelage-hideux-terrible\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 9 : \u00ab Attelage hideux et terrible\u2026 \u00bb<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2018\/05\/jdf-episode-10-lecoute-brouillee\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 10 : \u00ab L\u2019\u00e9coute brouill\u00e9e \u00bb<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2019\/09\/jdf-episode-11-former-a-powerpoint-sans-utiliser-powerpoint-fastoche-partie-1\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 11 : Former \u00e0 PowerPoint sans utiliser PowerPoint ? Fastoche ! (partie 1)<\/a><br \/>\n&#8211; <a href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2019\/09\/jdf-episode-11-former-a-powerpoint-sans-utiliser-powerpoint-fastoche-suite-et-fin\/\"target=\"blank\">#JDF Episode 11 : Former \u00e0 PowerPoint sans utiliser PowerPoint ? Fastoche ! (suite et fin)<\/a><br \/>\n&nbsp;<br \/>\n&nbsp;<br \/>\n&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Nous lan\u00e7ons une nouvelle s\u00e9rie d&rsquo;articles : \u00ab\u00a0Le journal du formateur\u00a0\u00bb. Ces articles seront l&rsquo;occasion de faire le tour des gal\u00e8res que connaissent tous les formateurs, mais aussi de mettre en avant les meilleurs moments de ce chouette m\u00e9tier. Vous souhaitez vous aussi t\u00e9moigner ? Ecrivez-nous : contact@sydologie.com La directrice de la formation avait r\u00e9serv\u00e9&#8230; <a class=\"view-article\" href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/06\/jdf-episode-1-imaginez-pire-meme-sil-nest-jamais\/\">Voir l&rsquo;article<\/a>","protected":false},"author":29,"featured_media":5834,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"rop_custom_images_group":[],"rop_custom_messages_group":[],"rop_publish_now":"initial","rop_publish_now_accounts":[],"rop_publish_now_history":[],"rop_publish_now_status":"pending","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5832","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-le-mag"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>#JDF Episode 1\u00a0: imaginez le pire, m\u00eame s\u2019il n\u2019est jamais s\u00fbr - Sydologie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/sydo.fr\/sydologie\/2017\/06\/jdf-episode-1-imaginez-pire-meme-sil-nest-jamais\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"#JDF Episode 1\u00a0: imaginez le pire, m\u00eame s\u2019il n\u2019est jamais s\u00fbr - Sydologie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Nous lan\u00e7ons une nouvelle s\u00e9rie d&rsquo;articles : \u00ab\u00a0Le journal du formateur\u00a0\u00bb. 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